Releasing Judgment in Relationship 🧡

We hurt because we judge, as at the core of every pain or problem lies a judgment. To achieve true freedom and happiness, we must identify and release the conditions we impose on being lovable, embracing Unconditional Love.

Releasing Pain In Relationships 🧡

Letting go of judgments in relationships, and in ourselves.

We Hurt, Because We Judge

I know, that feels too easy and black and white. But at the heart of every single pain or problem, is a judgment.

If we want to be free – as happy and free as Fenix for example, we are called to expand into and live from Unconditional Love.

And so our evolution is clear – find the conditions we place against being Lovable – and let those conditions go.

Or get a relationship - and it will take you to those conditions in a flash 🤣

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Releasing Your Judgments, Frees Your Life.

The power and miracle about releasing judgments against others, is that you release them from YOUR life, and in doing so free and liberate yourself, your energy and your happiness.

Whatever we’re judging another for, we’re also judging ourselves of that same thing – and those judgments are the chains holding us back from the life we want.

A Very Personal Example.

I used to judge my husband as lazy. It would infuriate me.

When he would get up 2 hours after me – I would be agitated.

When he wasn’t stressed and working harder – I would get annoyed.

You see one of my biggest judgments in life – that I picked up ALL through my childhood, is ‘you’re not lovable if you don’t work hard and be good’. Being lazy is bad. And not working hard enough means you don’t get love.

I would get so triggered, when he wasn’t working hard, because I wanted desperately NOT to work hard! I felt trapped in an unconscious cage. My judgment was forcing me to always be working hard because that’s how I get love. So it was infuriating this idea that someone else could get loved and relax and enjoy life. That made me mad. Until I realized I could rewire my judgments and allow myself to be lovable even if I’m not working hard.

It’s taken many years, but learning to release the judgment of it’s wrong or bad NOT to work hard, has made a huge difference in my life. And I’m so grateful that my husband triggered me into finding it xoxoox.

I’m so grateful I can now NOT always be working hard. And I can relax and enjoy my life.

What a gift. Thank you releasing judgments 🤣

Love you! Zoë

A Sacred Rewiring Workout

Releasing Judgments in Relationships, and Ourselves

  1. Who’s the person in your life that’s most challenging?
  2. How do you judge them?! It can be subtle, but answer these questions to find your judgments:
    1. What do they do wrong, or sometimes feels wrong?
    2. What are they bad at, or it feels bad to you?
    3. What should they be doing differently?
    4. What’s not ok, about who, or how they are sometimes?
  3. Define the judgment as a condition. Find the condition against lovability.
    1. It’s wrong to be selfish. Judgment = Selfish
    2. It’s bad to be late all the time. Judgment = Tardy, Disorganized
    3. They should be kinder and more thoughtful. Judgment = Careless, Thoughtless
    4. It’s not ok to shout and yell. Judgment = Cruel
  4. Let go of this condition making you unLovable. Let go of this judgment. Be open to the truth that you ARE Lovable even if you express this condition. [Important: Letting go of the judgment of Cruel is not saying I WANT to be cruel, or I condone being cruel in anyway. It’s simply accepting that cruelty happens sometimes, and I’m not going to withdraw my love because of it. Read this if you’d like to unpack releasing judgment further.]
  5. Forgive yourself for various moments when you have expressed this condition. Keep saying or writing the statement until you feel still and silent.
    1. I forgive myself for judging myself as selfish… when I didn’t stay at home and help my Mum when she was sick… etc
    2. I forgive myself for judging myself as bad and an absolute mess… for never making it to clarinet practice on time… etc
    3. I forgive myself for judging myself as careless… when I crashed Dad’s car… etc
    4. I forgive myself for judging myself as cruel… when I was a little bit bitchy to my Mother in Law… etc
  6. Claim your truth.
    1. And the truth is that I am lovable, even if I’m selfish sometimes.
    2. And the truth is that I am lovable, even if I’m late sometimes.
    3. And the truth is that I am lovable, even if I’m careless sometimes.
    4. And the truth is that I am lovable, even if I’m cruel sometimes.

We Believe In Us

If you want more support, we’re creating a Sacred Circle 💫

Learn More

Today's Advanced Resource is a Rewiring Process for Using Relationship Challenges to Upgrade Your Beliefs About Love

Just 9 questions to support us in identifying the judgments and misbeliefs holding us back from greater love and connection in our life, and allow the next steps towards the love we want.

CALLS 📹 + Recordings HERE! •  FULL 💫 Dashboard is HERE!

[ADVANCED] Rewiring Process Here • [TODAY] Guide & References Here

About the author
Dr. Zoë & Fenix

Dr. Zoë & Fenix

The ultimate happy coaching combo. Fenix supports humans be their best selves and beyond. Dr. Zoë adds a little science and strategy.

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