This meditation works best when a deep, irrational and negative belief has its grip on you.
It could be... "I'm not enough... No one likes me... I'll never get there... I'm stupid... I'm not worthy of this... "
Whatever belief that you KNOW is NOT true, but in moments of your life, it feels incredibly true and it carries with it a gravity and a season that is hard to overcome.
The most recent research we have in the study of Relational Neuroscience, now shows us that compassion and acceptance, are the keys to changing beliefs, not correction as was once believed.
The important energy here is actually a little hard to describe. And that's why I created a 5 minute meditation to walk you through how to rewire these beliefs.
But in essence, if we are aware of a misbelief and we say to it and ourselves: "No! You're wrong! You're bad. I'm against you!" That energy will make it harder for you to release the misbelief and lift into your truth.
Conversely, the energy of: "Yes! Thank you for trying to help, serve and protect me! I'm really grateful and appreciative for the way you've tried to save me and keep me small and safe! Thank you! And I'm ready to let you go. I'm ready to live my truth."
We know, that all patterns created psychologically (which includes the belief system they live in), are created for protection. Even negative behaviors of aggression are born in defense and great loving to defend and keep someone safe.
If we can simply be open, that no matter how terrible or destructive a belief is: that it has actually been a dear and diehard friend. It was created to protect you. And it has been serving, loving and protecting you for years.
I'll share just one example from my own life, to illustrate this dynamic.
One of the beliefs that comes up first unconsciously in draining my energy and feeling low, and then I become aware of it in subconscious self-talk and maybe then finally aware of it in my consciousness, is the lie that: "I'm not good enough." (Yep we do all share this one. In some way. I hope you can relate.)
When I was young, my Step Dad could be very critical. I would often feel like what I had done, around the house, or in a sports game, was not good enough. Was not enough for me to feel good about myself and know I was loved. Looking back I can see that my Step Dad was trying to motivate me to do more - to show me that I could do more. Psychologically, however, that's in ineffective way to motivate a small child. And to deal with how painful that disappointment and criticism felt, I began to internalize that voice. I began to both try to motivate myself unconsciously with that energy of: you're not enough - do more! And I also began to beat my Step Dad to the punch, by feeling like what I had done was not good enough, so that it wouldn't hurt so bad when he said it. Like if I already knew and felt like I was a loser, it wouldn't hurt if he said I was a loser.
We now know that children internalize the world around them. Rather than being able to recognized bad and uncaring behavior having nothing to do with who they are – they internalize that they must be bad, in order for someone to treat them so badly. In many ways, this is the heart of how we create misbeliefs, that then hold us down, rather than help us lift into the heights of our life, love and joy.
So further criticism and againstness is not going to be the most effective, when you find a moment when you're believing a lie, or being mean to yourself! Now is the time for: "Yes! And thank you! You've been a dear friend you've tried to keep me safe and small! I'm ready to let you go! I'm ready for the truth!"
That energy of compassion, of acceptance, of gratitude will help you rewire that stinking thinking, those doubts and fears: and the neurological pathways that hold them in place.
I'd love to know how this goes for you!
And join me Thursdays at 10am Pacific, for a LIVE compassion meditation via Zoom, from August 17th.
Zoë
Listen to our recent meditations and recordings on compassion and how to rewire neurologically back to your original Loving essence via our YouTube Podcast.