Fenix’ PepTalk
Did you know we all feel Not Enough sometimes… or a lot of the time? Well you are enough to me.
No matter what you do today, or don’t do today, you deserve to feel good about yourself! You deserve to know and feel that You ARE Enough!
So if you only tell yourself 1 Kind Thing today…
Please tell yourself: I Am Enough!
No matter what I do, or don’t do today, I AM ENOUGH!
I love you.
Fenixxoxoox
The Profound Power of Enoughness
Strategy from Dr. Zoë Lumiere
Ok, so we’ve all heard about the glass being half full, or half empty.
But did you know just how much more energy you have, if you relate to yourself through that positive lens of being FULL rather than empty?! Well recent research from Dr. Kristin Neff is showing us, that Self-Esteem and Self-Criticism are not as motivating as we once thought. And that Self-Compassion is much more powerful if we want to grow, change, improve and do more with our life.
So consider this example. Your intention was to go to the gym 3 times this week, but you only went 1 time. How do you feel? And are you calling this ENOUGH, or NOT ENOUGH?! If you can feel that 1 time was ENOUGH! If you can compassionately know and experience that that was your BEST for this week (given all you had going on, given all the challenges within you, and around you)… IF YOU CAN say that was enough… you are likely to do more next week.
If however you feel bad, and critical and you punish yourself for only going once this week, chances are you’ll do even less next week.
I know, it’s hard to feel good about going to the gym just once, when we wanted to go 3 times… but just think about how you’d motivate and support a friend, or your child. Would you say: you suck, you should have gone 3 times. Just go to the gym. You’re pathetic. Or would you say: awww, you did your best! Life’s not as easy as we think it is. You’ve got this! One time was great! I believe in you! Keep going. You’ll get to 3 times a week?!
Do you notice the difference?! Ok we’ll dive into a step by step guide for more below.
Also the Thursday Rewiring Session this week will help you learn the science behind why and how powerful feeling Enough is. Zoë shares about why feeling enough is so important, and how to move from criticism to compassion and kindness here: https://allowinglove.org/7-day-radical-self-kindness-adventure/
Making the Shift from Not Enough to ENOUGH
Step by Step Guide
This is not an easy shift to make. Most of us were conditioned and raised through a lens of tough-love being more motivating than kindness and compassion. And so it may require patience to truly turn the tide to experience the profound impact coming into TRULY feeling like you are doing enough, and like you are enough.
1. At the end of each day simply say: I did enough, and do your best to feel it.
2. For any resistance you feel (like maybe you ate too much ice-cream, so you feel like you weren’t healthy or good enough in that way): Let yourself see, that life is hard. Given ALL you have going on, that today was your BEST. Maybe you’ll do better tomorrow. But given all the seen and unseen challenges in your world today, that was ENOUGH.
3. Keep reviewing any resistance that pops up, that holds you back from truly feeling like everything you did today was enough. Just do your best, to let yourself off the hook, and to feel that you did your best.
4. Complete by telling yourself: I Am Enough. No matter what I did, or didn’t do today, I AM ENOUGH!
Pro Tip 🏆 Repeat! At the end of each day! You’ll notice how much easier it gets over time, to actually feel like whatever you did today, is ENOUGH!!! And more importantly over time you’ll see how much more energy and enthusiasm you have to grow and improve if you can call today MORE than ENOUGH!
From Dr. Zoë
I’m still catching up after moving, and traveling, and more. I’m really being called into greater levels of self-compassion, as I feel like I’m not getting my arms around all I have to do in my world: I’m really being called to walk my talk, and I am telling myself every night: I am enough! You did enough! Whatever you did, or didn’t do, hey Zoë it IS enough!!!!!
I hope you’re able to do that too. Because it’s true. You’re doing enough friend. Life is tough. You’re doing great.
We love you all so much. Come visit us anytime in Ojai.
Zoe and Fenix
