Today’s Lesson: Turning Judgment into Compassion and Love
Judgments are a primary thought pattern that blocks our joy, health, and abundance.
Unlike simple observations, judgments are charged with negativity.
For instance, noticing “someone is eating more than may be healthy” is neutral. But thinking, “that person is eating too much and is gross” is judgment, laden with criticism and discomfort. This negative charge signals an unhealthy judgment, often felt physically as an unpleasant sensation in the body.
Could This Common Belief Be Limiting You?
Often, we criticize because we don’t support certain behaviors.
For instance, we may criticize cruelty, laziness, or greed, hoping it will help eliminate them. But instead, judgment often reinforces these traits in ourselves and others.
The Path Forward, Inspired by the Dalai Lama
For years, the Dalai Lama has taught that compassion is the key to happiness. By expanding our capacity to love unconditionally, we bring more joy into our lives.
We’ll be much happier if we release the judgments that limit our capacity to love.
Love others even when they’re unkind. Love yourself, even in moments of laziness.
Accepting and loving someone doesn’t mean condoning or joining in, but simply setting things free.
For example, bullying is a coping mechanism, often driven by a fear of being unlovable. When we respond with love instead of adding more judgment, we can create freedom both for ourselves and for others.
Got Another 5 minutes? Let's Release Some Judgments
- What human characteristic do you judge? (Remember you’ve got to have a negative emotional charge along with the thought, for it to be a judgment. It can be subtle, but you have to feel it, not just think it.) Which one just pops into your mind now. It could be how you judge your husband as lazy. It could be how you judge your boss sometimes as stupid. It could be how you judge your friend as weak, or pathetic.
- How does it show up in your life? Who do you judge? When do you judge? Just be aware of the various ways it shows up in your life.
- What’s the negative emotional charge that takes place when you judge? Where do you feel it? How do you feel? Describe it fully.
- How do these judgments affect your joy, your love your peace? Just be aware, in these moments, in these areas of your life, how is your happiness and peace of mind negatively affected?
- Have compassion and understanding, for how human it is to judge. Can you tangibly feel loving compassion for yourself – it's hard NOT to judge! We're all conditioned and trained to. And so have compassion and understanding for how tough it is to truly release them. Just let a soft wave of compassion wash over you.
- How do you choose to live? What’s your intention, for treating this human characteristic in yourself and others? Consider… I am doing my best to let go of judging others and myself as lazy. I am being kind and compassionate to myself and others.
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