A Focus for Fulfillment

So I know my Mum and me are always telling you to Love yourself, Focus on yourself, Take care of yourself. And that stuff is so important! You’ve got to be FULL to give. You can’t give from an empty cup!!!

And focusing on others! Thinking about others! Taking care of others might be your next step to happiness and truly feeling free and abundant!

I can’t help myself. I love whatever I come in contact with.

In Ventura it was the Sea Lions. But in Ojai… oh my I am all about the horses!!!

What gets YOU moving in your world?! What do you love?! What do you care about??!!

These questions will HELP fill YOU up.

Focusing on others, helps us take care of ourselves!

Love 🐾 #YourHappyCoach, Fenix xoxox

So let’s get this into perspective first. Taking care of YOU is first.

If you’re hungry, cold and depressed. You are good to NOONE.

But if you are fed, and warm, and feeling full within… get ready to grow and expand by focusing on others!!!!

Focusing on others can provide a sense of purpose and fulfillment that is difficult to find when we are only thinking about ourselves. When we serve others, we are making a positive impact on someone else's life, which can be incredibly rewarding. It can also help us appreciate what we have and shift our perspective on life.

Another way to focus on others is by practicing empathy. Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. When we put ourselves in someone else's shoes and try to see things from their perspective, we can gain a deeper understanding of their experiences and connect with them on a more meaningful level. This can help us build stronger relationships and create a sense of community.

So let’s take a deeper dive into how we can help others, and deeply empathize with others around us.

Use this step-by-step guide to unpack your own life.

We all have an opportunity to look outside our own bubble, to see who’s struggling, who’s suffering, who can we serve?!

And if we don’t have time, or resources or energy to give anyone else, just our willingness to think and feel with other people, WILL HELP us transcend and transform our own challenges.

Let this week’s step by step guide show you how to serve others, in a way that serves you.

1. First, let’s do a little audit, on our own lives. Be honest. There is no shame in not having a lot to give right now! But you will delay your own progression if you continually focus on others when it is YOU that needs more support! And if you do have some time, some energy, some Love, some resources to GIVE… let’s explore how to expand, grow and have a more fulfilling life!
2. The key question is: do you ever feel like you have anything to give? Do you ever feel like you have some Love to give? Do you ever feel like you have time to give? Do you ever feel like you have money or resources to give? If you feel Yes 25% of the time or above! Keep moving through the questions below. If less than 25% just know that It’s OK to Focus on You Right Now! Times will change. But only if you can love and take care of you the way you need!
3. Let’s Focus On Others! Let’s find a group of folks that are struggling right now, and let’s see what we have to give them! Use the following questions to choose a group of people to serve.

a. Who do you WANT to serve?

b. Who do you feel CALLED to serve recently?

c. Who just pops into your mind right now?

d. And if you still don’t have a focus right now, consider: People experiencing hunger or homelessness, people experiencing some kind of trauma or abuse that is important to you, people experiencing a disability, people experiencing injustice, people experiencing sadness or suffering. Trust whatever specific examples or groups of people that pops into your head and your heart right now.

4.  So which group is most present right now?  Write that down.  Trust that in serving and loving them, there is great freedom and fulfillment here for you.

5.  So first, just know that in feeling empathy, oneness and kindness for others, even before giving money, or time, or anything else, that the whole world lifts in vibration and consciousness. So give your love, your warm vibes, your prayers and your well-wishes to this group just now. Let yourself feel. Let yourself feel whatever you’re feeling right now. And let yourself feel the Love and Kindness in your heart to theirs.

6.  Next become aware of what your heart wants to give. This could be money, time, resources, gifts, ideas, feedback, etc. It’s so hard to let go of what SHOULD we give… so we can truly find what we are CALLED to give? Let go of your head and ask your heart?! What am I called to give these people at this time?!

7.  Now just do your best. If you have something specific you’re called to give - do your best and give it. If not - just be open to giving and serving more.

8.  Let yourself feel the fullness, the Love, the whole Spirit that moves in you when you serve. Let yourselve feel that oneness, that connection, that friendship with all others.

9.  Now become aware… does serving and feeling for other people help you?! What are you aware of?! What will help YOU be more kind, loving and abundant in your life moving forward?!

Pro Tip 🏆 When We Give We Receive

When we give of the overflow in our life, whether or not that is an overflow of smiles, or money, or time, or clothes, or kind words… we cannot HELP but feel rich and full and abundant.  Remember it is only in giving that we truly understand and experience abundance. So let’s keep expanding and allowing our fullness to flow to others and beyond.

Ok this one is a little tough for me.

I didn’t grow up with a lot of money. And I did grow up feeling like I should always take care of everyone else, before I should take care of me first.

So I do not say this lightly, if you’re struggling with giving, or with service, know that it’s OK to focus on your own needs first. It’s ok to have NOTHING to give. It’s ok to feel empty. It’s ok to need time to rest, to recover, to rejuvenate.

It is our NATURE to give. Or rather, it is MY nature to give. And you might also feel the same.

When I can allow myself to feel FULL… in love, in friendship, in food, in money, in clothes, in kind words, in anything… I feel like a king when I realize I can give and serve and change another’s life by giving.

And if there is one thing I have recently observed we all need a little more of (because I just spent a week on the East Coast)… it is smiles.

I LOVE giving smiles. I love connecting with anyone, and everyone, just because I can.

And sometimes I don’t have smiles to give. Sometimes I need to lay low.

But when I have smiles to give… oh what a beautiful day!

I’m just so glad you’re here.

Thanks for helping me give. Thanks for helping me serve.

No matter what is your own special sauce — someone out there wants it, and NEEDS it!

So keep being you, keep sharing you - and let’s keep giving of the overflow.

As always, don’t hesitate to send me any questions!

Love, Zoe and Fenix xoxoox

P.S. We are going back to daily Fenix emails!